By Barton Goldsmith

Some people have what I have come to call "broken pickers." They just can’t seem to pick good partners for themselves.

If this is something you’re dealing with, here are some tips for making good choices when it comes to dating and mating.

• People will tell you exactly who they are; it’s up to you to listen. If someone says they’re usually in a bad mood or don’t know how to be monogamous, hear what they are saying and don’t think you can change them.

• Take a test drive. Go for an eight-hour drive with your intended. Whatever difficulties you may have will make themselves painfully obvious. This test is not for the faint of heart or for those with heart conditions.

• Look for someone who is kind and loving. If you’re really lucky, your partner also will have a family who taught him or her how to be that way. Having in-laws who treat you like a member of the family will make your life much nicer.

• Make sure the person you’re seeing doesn’t smoke, even if you do. If he or she is a nonsmoker, it may get you to stop. Think of it this way, you’re choosing happiness over death.

• Find someone you can talk to. As time passes, this quality is more important than looks, money, or position. If you can’t talk to your partner or cry on his or her shoulder, it’s not going to be a good match.